Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Randomize
