I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
