I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
