Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
