Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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