It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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