when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
