But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
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