How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i will never coherently bang her
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
