I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Sorry about my life...
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Randomize
