Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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