no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Randomize
