$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
