So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
I will die if light touches me.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I have already put on my inside pants.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
