Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Randomize