But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
