tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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