She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
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Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
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Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
i out mim tonsoeep
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