cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
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