so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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