can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
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