Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
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