I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
