apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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