sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
