i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
