Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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