I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
