Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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