then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
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