You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize