Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
That was before I lit my hair on fire
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
