She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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