You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I'm experimenting with sincerity
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
