operation have a gay friend backfired
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
