he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize