Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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