Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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