TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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