you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
