All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
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