I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
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we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
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No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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