check it out our google latitudes are spooning
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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