So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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