my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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