i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
