We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
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