Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
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