About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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