i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
