i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
